Important Update: This article discusses serious topics including harassment and health challenges. Please read with care.
A Difficult Decision
After much consideration and recent events, I've made the difficult decision to step back from most of my public-facing activities and social media presence. This isn't a decision I've made lightly, but one that has become necessary for my health, safety and overall well-being.
Health Comes First
Many of you may not know, but I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis (MS) last year. On top of that, I also deal with narcolepsy and ongoing stomach issues. These three conditions create a perfect storm that makes day-to-day life incredibly challenging.
The combination of MS fatigue, narcolepsy episodes and stomach problems means I can become completely non-responsive without warning. There are days where my body simply shuts down and I have no control over it. The stomach issues alone have landed me in the hospital multiple times and when combined with MS flare-ups and narcolepsy, it becomes nearly impossible to maintain any kind of consistent public presence.
My recent hospitalization was yet another reminder that my health can't be negotiated with. I need rest, I need predictability and I need to eliminate as much stress as possible from my life. The constant pressure of maintaining an online presence while dealing with these conditions has proven to be unsustainable.
The stress of maintaining a public presence, combined with recent harassment issues, has taken a significant toll on both my physical and mental health. It's become clear that I need to step back and focus on what truly matters: my health and the people closest to me.
Harassment & Safety Concerns
The harassment I'm currently experiencing from individual(s) connected to ChilloutVR is not an isolated incident. It's the latest in a series of harassment campaigns I've endured over the years. When I took over Cats, I faced harassment. With Neoneko, I faced harassment. Time and time again, I've dealt with targeted attacks and bullying from various communities and individuals.
I've always tried to push through it, to keep going and not let it get to me. But when you combine years of harassment with deteriorating health conditions, there comes a point where you simply can't take anymore. I've reached that point.
While I'm uncertain of the exact identity of those currently harassing me, I want to make it clear that I am documenting everything. If I discover who is responsible, I will not hesitate to involve my legal team to address this matter. I'm done being silent and I'm done accepting this as "just part of being online."
No one should have to deal with harassment, especially when managing serious health conditions. This behavior is unacceptable and there will be consequences.
Leaving Social VR Behind
I've decided to step away from Social VR entirely. I will never be returning to ChilloutVR again. As for VRChat, I'll only be logging in occasionally for music events or when a close friend specifically asks me to join them.
I haven't touched any Social VR platform since New Year's and honestly It's been refreshing. I've been reconnecting with friends through other games and it's reminded me of what gaming should be: fun, relaxing and free from the drama that has plagued Social VR spaces.
The reality is that many of my friends have already hung up their VR headsets. The community I once knew has largely moved on and I think it's time for me to do the same. VR will always hold special memories for me, but this chapter has come to a close.
Friend List Purge
Because I don't know where the harassment is originating from or which group is responsible, I've made the difficult decision to remove approximately 99% of people I knew from ChilloutVR from my Discord and Steam friends lists. The drama and uncertainty surrounding CVR left me with no other choice. I simply can't risk my safety and peace of mind.
My Discord friends list went from 120 people down to just 14. I had hundreds of people across these platforms, many of whom I haven't spoken to since late 2024. Old acquaintances who had become distant strangers. It was time for a clean slate.
If anyone truly cares about staying connected, they're welcome to add me back. But please don't bother if you're not actually going to talk to me. I'm done maintaining one-sided friendships and keeping people around out of obligation. My energy is too precious and my health too fragile to waste on superficial connections.
The Neoneko Exception
While I'm stepping back from most public activities, I will continue to work on Neoneko and maintain a slight public presence for the project. However, I'll be doing so under a new Discord account with my new username completely separate from this one.
Once the transfer is complete, the Yusarina account will be removed from the Neoneko server entirely. I want to separate my professional and personal accounts as much as possible. This separation is essential for my mental health and safety, allowing me to compartmentalize and protect my personal life while still contributing to projects I care about.
Username Changes & Fresh Start
As part of this transition, I'll be changing my username across various public-facing platforms, including GitHub and other social media accounts. However, I will not be changing my username on Discord or VRChat. These will remain the same for those who need to reach me.
This is both a fresh start and an additional layer of privacy and security on public platforms. Updates on new usernames will be shared selectively with close friends and necessary contacts.
About This Website
This website will no longer be updated. I may create a new website under my new public username in the future, but for now, this marks the end of updates to yusarina.com. Consider this article the final chapter of this particular online presence.
Moving Forward
This isn't goodbye forever, but it is a significant shift in how I'll be engaging with online communities. I need to prioritize my health, my safety and my peace of mind. I'm grateful for everyone who has supported me over the years and I hope you understand why this step is necessary.
To those who have been genuine friends and supporters: thank you. You know who you are and you know how to reach me.
To those who have contributed to the harassment: your actions have consequences and they will be addressed appropriately.
I'm looking forward to this next chapter: one that's quieter, healthier and filled with the things and people that truly matter.
Thank you to everyone who has shown kindness and support during this difficult time. It means more than you know.